What do you spend the most time doing, what do you love doing most, or what things are most interested in? What do these mean to you? Why are you interested in them?
Most of the time I'm just focusing on my career at the same time I am trying to enjoy life. Before I left high school, I feel like I didn't get to explore a lot of "other doors". For example, I've mentioned since I was little that I love movies. Its a passion and its an art of self-expression. I didn't pursue the film career in high school because I never had an advantage or an outlook to let me find out more information about it. I mean I like Forensic Science, but I can't express myself with this career as much as I have a passion for film. To enter film, you need to write a screenplay; like my science teacher told me "I should write a book about the s*** that I've been through. It'd be a great movie to see." However, Forensic Science for me is more like a 'grown-up' decision made, because right now the economic isn't sweeping any more money than I am any closer to making a movie as good as Steven Spielberg. Besides that, my mom told me that this type of job is kinda average; I mean a lot of people are interested and I would have to be extremely crafty to make it out in Hollywood. I love movies; I love watching movies over and over, I remember quotes, scenery locations, actors, gag reel, behind the scenes, analysis, etc. There is a wide range of quantities that movies can offer to people, but you as the viewer need to visualize behind the masterpiece to understand what is truly to appreciate. That's why people are amazed of the magic of Harry Potter, or the action-packed Transformers or the globalization of Danny Boyle's Slumdog Millionaire. However, getting off topic, I am trying to make my parents proud by pursuing in a career that will make them think of me as a good child. What am I trying to say? Since the 'coming-out' phase, I've been labeled as the hateful child, abuser, gay mother******, etc. I need to show them that it was worth it sending me 3,000 miles away and whats' even worse is not studying what is appealing to me because my mother said it was worthless. Its something better than nothing and in any business you need to start somewhere even if you have nothing. I asked my mom the other day, "Mom, did you want to do anything else than being a judge?" "I wanted to open a boutique salon." "Why didn't you do it?" "I did what I needed to do and it was to face the reality of it and move on." Wow, Mom. Way to be. I still don't get her way of thinking because society has changed and even if I studied film, I'd be really good at it because of my creative skills. I regret not taking any of the AP English courses in high school in which I could have improved my writing. I regret getting out of DUS when my mother complained that I only wanted to study Forensic Science; which the interest of film came in the spark of the moment. I wish we had more time in the world to explore and find out what is our purpose. I mean its just that there is no time. I don't know, I still like film and right now Chemistry kicking me in the ass.
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